Dear 23 You,

Happy Belated Birthday, Sugh. You are a year older and each day that has passed, you’ve become a bit wiser. 

This is my gift to you, the New Year is approaching and there a few things you need to let go of, a few things you need to accept, understand and learn.

  1. Trust God. Have faith. Remember no matter the situation, you have purpose. Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.
  2. Don’t seek, don’t search, don’t ask, don’t knock, don’t demand – relax. If you relax, it comes. If you relax, it is there. If you relax, you start vibrating with it.
  3. Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; He’s the one who will keep you on track.
  4. Every time you are tempted to react in the same old way, ask if you want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future.
  5. It’s okay to be sad, but try not to forget about what makes you happy.
  6. Stay away from people who make you feel like you’re hard to love.
  7. Don’t waste another minute dealing with a toxic, negative, energy-draining person. Some people are wired for negativity. They love being argumentative, combative and abusive. Run for your life as quickly as possible.
  8. Your naked body should only belong to the person who falls in love with your naked soul.
  9. If you want good things to happen in your life you first have to believe good things are possible for yourself. Quit allowing negative and cynical thinking to get in the way of the good life you deserve.
  10. You’re supposed to be the leading lady of your own life, for god’s sake! Stop seeking validation.
  11. Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one.
  12. Be brave. Take risks. Nothing can substitute experience.
  13. Everything you feel to say, say it. DO NOT hold anything back. Nothing you feel should be subjected by the fear of a reaction.
  14. You can be a good person with a kind heart and still say no.
  15. Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be.
  16. You will move on. You will let go of him. Don’t beat yourself up because you haven’t yet. Give yourself time.
  17. If you want to be proud of yourself, then do things in which you can take pride.
  18. Always give people the benefit of the doubt – but if something feels off, trust your intuition.
  19. At the end of the day, all you have is yourself and that has to be enough.
  20. Believe people when they show you who they are the first time.
  21. Never stop believing in love. No matter how much it hurts.
  22. Be patient with your plans. Be grateful for your opportunities. Stay awake, pay attention. Escape. Commit. Keep moving. Keep asking. Raise a glass for the wins, raise a glass for the losses. The good news is, you are strong enough to get knocked down and then try again.
  23. In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you.



Five months.

Well, I’m alive with smiles but memories of you still linger and manage to tear the stitches on wounds open again.

My palms are on fire from the rope burn I got trying to climb my way back to clouds we use to sit on, above all the sad lonely people we use to promise never to become.

Guess it was all wishful thinking.

Which reminds me, twelve days and countdown to a wish that’ll never come true. But somewhere in that blue house, hidden in that mind of yours, I wonder what’s new for you.

The greatest pain is trying to remember how it all happened. Yet still, I pray for you whenever this little heart of mine aches and misses you, I pray for you because that is all I can do.

And if you’re wondering, it’s still just me and me alone. Not that it matters or that it is being shown. I just can’t fill the void you caused or have found a love so deep. This is still your home, it’s your name that hangs above the door as I sleep.

A love like…

“I want to love her so much and so well that when people look at me loving her, they won’t think it’s just a phase or that I’m doing it for attention. I want people to look at me loving her and think, I wish someone loved me like that. I want people to look at me loving her and see that I would do anything for this girl and that I’ll stick by her through thick and thin and that I love her even when I hate her. I want people to look at me loving her and know that I love her like I’ve never loved anyone and I won’t be asked to prove it because it will be so damn obvious how much I love her. I want people to look at me loving her and see that I mean well in this life and that even though I screw up, I would never intentionally hurt her. I just want to love her without constantly being judged or questioned for it because I swear I’ve never loved anyone as much as I love her.”


“Someone can be madly in love with you and still not be ready. They can love you in a way you have never been loved and still not join you on the bridge. And whatever their reasons, you must leave. Because you never ever have to inspire anyone to meet you on the bridge. You never ever have to convince someone to do the work or to be ready. There is more extraordinary love, more love that you have never seen, out here in this wide and wild universe. And that is the love that will be ready.”


I play my heart, I actually trick it into loving someone else
I use my attention and put it into someone else, I focus entirely on him, I love him and miss him
I miss him so much I write about him
I miss his touch, his smile and the way he looked at me
I hurt from missing him
But he caught my mind misleading my heart long before I did,
I was blind to the fact that I’m using him as a distraction from you,
I really thought I fell deep for him
But he saw you in my eyes every time he tried drowning in them
I never understood the anger in his eyebrows and devastation in his face whenever he looked deep into me
He started testing my every word and investigating my every move
He saw you, right under my skin, he felt you.
He knew, that every phrase I spoke; was meant for you
He realized, that every emotion I felt; was waiting for you
How sad…


Strip Me

You think you’ve seen her naked because she took her clothes off? Tell me about her dreams. Tell me what breaks her heart. What is she passionate about, and what makes her cry? Tell me about her childhood. Better yet, tell me one story about her that you’re not in.  

You’ve seen her skin, and you’ve touched her body. But you still know as much about her as a book you once found, but never got around to opening.