i almost did it. i almost sent that text. i almost drafted another email. i need to know how you are. i need to hear your voice, something that sounds familiar besides the one i play over and over from the voicemail you sent two years ago. i need to remember you. i stumbled upon some text posts. i don’t know how i did but i did. written by someone who could have been you, missing someone, falling in love with another…it torn me apart because i knew there was no way it could be you. everyone keeps saying you’ve moved on. traveling now. this is torture. i loved you with everything within me. i still do. and now i’m better. i’ll listen. i’ve learned. teach me. i won’t argue. i won’t fight. i just want you. i want our future. i can’t pray the love away anymore. god won’t allow me to forget you. no matter how many times i beg to. i miss you. i want you to tell me everything: where have you been? who have you met? are you still eating when you’re hungry? i swear almost did it. i almost broke down again. was this the sign? call me. or even text me. please. it’s been one year, sixty-three days, twenty-two hours, three mins…but who’s counting. i’m ready.


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