Selfish

Here  I go waiting for you again. Sometimes I feel like an insecure wife always waiting for her husband to come home and lend her his attention; too bad we’re not married and your far from my reach to dig my nails in your skin. I’m planning on ignoring your call tonight, punishing you for having fun without me even though fun with me begins the day I get there; why the hell not now!

So what, yes I like talking to you; why is that so big of a deal?! I barely spoke to you today because you had to study but now its your “boy’s birthday” and you just have to jump on the bandwagon and lessen our time together.

FUCK YOU!

I am not some insecure chick that waits on her man to call just to check in or understands every time he forgets his phone or when his battery is dying or just because he’s too busy watching tv to give me his full attention. You keep saying I deserve time, what time do I get? OOHHH please! Yeah right, this is me being selfish again right; it’s always about me being selfish!! Well let me be selfish, let me scream at you for not speaking to me when I want you to. Let me scream for when I feel like I need you. Let me be weak dammit, I’m not use to this! I’m not ready for love, feeling vulnerable, feeling weak, feeling like I need you al the fucking time but here I am; this is me doing those things so let me be selfish.

Don’t talk to me. I don’t want to hear about how tired you are because you had a long day because you’re always tired! You’re always tired and I have to be understanding, I have to be the good girlfriend.

Let me be selfish.

Just don’t fucking talk to me.

I HATE YOU!

No..dammit, I love you so much it hurts.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s