Family Portrait…

It wont stop, it’s only getting worse and I feel like I’m the cause of it.

Why?

I’m spoiled, a bit too selfish. When one says “no”, the other says “yes” and it causes conflict.

I’m sorry.

If it’s not me it’s them.

One holds back, the other gives too much. It’s never equal, never enough.

It’s impossible to not hurt, nor to feel pain while watching this happen.

Knowing the true reason you stuck through it so long is for the three of us because “love” doesn’t grow after 26 years.

I thought it was done.

Smiles returned, greeted with Laughter sending Joy a kiss hello; now Joy was killed by Pride and Laughter turned to Tears for comfort.

Help me.

I’m trapped in this “family portrait”, screaming for help but no one sees enough to understand.

I can’t cry, not that I don’t want to because if I could, I would. Anything to save myself from this.

Tears have parted with me, too afraid that I’d become too dependent so he asked for “space”, saying it’s best we don’t meet again. I agreed and since then Silence is all I have. He tells me to hold it in, believing that Tears was full of shit anyway.

Stress, along with Headaches, stops by almost everyday, just to make me remember what Life has given me.

So this is it; our family.

More of a dead-end.

Phone Calls and Texts take too much time to reach, so I cheat on them with Darkness. Just waiting until it’s all over.

Story of my life.

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